Possessing peace of mind requires you to feel calm. However, sometimes you need a little reassurance to make this a reality.
Defined by the Oxford Dictionary of English and published in the Patient Education and Counseling journal in Science Direct, reassurance is ‘the action of removing someone's doubts or fears.”
At its core, reassurance is designed to provide comfort in order to move past a particular difficulty. While its over-usage can lead to compulsive behavior, decreased self-esteem, and anxiety, reassurance in the right dosage can be a game changer for anyone seeking greater peace of mind, especially at the moment.
But how do you obtain it? This article will explore the five ways to find reassurance when you really need it, whether it be through close friends, partners, therapists, or yourself.
1. Communicate Your Needs Honestly
One of the big hurdles to securing comfort in times of stress is letting people know how you’re genuinely feeling.
Because everyone has different coping mechanisms and responses to stress, you may have feelings of shame or embarrassment.
Or you may fear how they’ll respond to your needs. However, you can overcome this by being as honest with your tribe as possible.
Let’s say, for example, that you suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). From simply observing the behavior, your friend might not realize how a situation outside of your control is affecting you, or worse, why it’s such a big deal.
By explaining how the situation or stressor makes you feel, how it impacts your thinking, and what you need at the moment, your friend can respond appropriately because you’re providing a guideline.
This process can help you find the reassurance you need now and set a blueprint for them to follow moving forward.
2. Practice Self-Reflection
Yes, you can always seek reassurance from a friend or relative, but you shouldn’t ignore the importance of being the one to provide it to yourself.
If you’re struggling with the need for reassurance, take some time to reflect on your past. Have you been in a similar situation before, and if so, how did you handle it?
Chances are you’ve experienced similar emotions, including fear, anxiety, and sadness, before and found a way to deal with them.
Recalling memories of prior hardships and their subsequent triumphs is the best way to reassure yourself that you’ve done this once before and survived - and you will again.
3. Develop A Mantra
In addition to self-reflection and recalling times of success from memory, toss a mantra into the mix. These positive words or phrases of affirmation can be repeated once or multiple times a day.
Their goal is to remind you of your strengths, which can provide reassurance in times when you need it the most.
There’s no set formula for developing a mantra, and there’s no shortage of interesting phrases you can say, but here are just a few to help you get started:
- I am capable of getting through tough things
- I will get through this
- I will find a lesson in this opportunity for growth
- I am strong
4. Enroll In Therapy
Most therapists won’t provide reassurance in the traditional way you’re looking for it.
For example, they’re not going to give you the all-clear to dive head-first into an unhealthy coping mechanism or tell you everything’s going to be okay if you have common anxiety disorders (like OCD, which requires you to accept the uncertainty of life).
However, they will provide reassurance that you can develop the tools and coping mechanisms to get through every problem.
This kind of reassurance is beneficial because it is designed to help you trust yourself more as opposed to second-guessing yourself or relying on the reassurance of others, which may not prove useful over a prolonged period.
5. Identify Your Triggers
If you’re finding yourself constantly seeking reassurance, it may be worth pausing to self-reflect and identify your triggers.
The goal of this self-reflection is to identify thoughts, patterns, or situations that lead you to need reassurance.
By identifying them, you may be able to work through them more easily.
For example, if you are seeking reassurance from your boss that you’re not going to get fired, it may be stemming from a previously bad experience or an insecurity that you don’t add as much value to the company as another employee.
Identifying the catalyst of the reassurance-seeking behavior can go a long way in not just giving yourself what you need during these times, but learning to move past them, as well.
However you get your reassurances, they can all help you achieve peace of mind, whether on a temporary or long term basis.
Remember, you are the best proof of triumph so don’t be afraid to recall from memory all the times you overcame challenges in the past.
